To all new/young Military Wives (and their husbands)...

OK, my husband has only been away at training for 1 week, and we have actually had a great time here! Sure, the kids frustrate me at times, but for the most part we had a really relaxing week, got to spend some time with friends, and I even read THREE books during my free time! I'm realizing how much LESS work I have to do when husband is gone-- I don't have to cook fresh dinners each night or make his lunch, there was 1 less load of laundry, I didn't have to run any errands for him, and I didn't have to watch any hockey! :-)
But already, some of the younger/newer wives in the battalion are starting to bug me. Sure, communication has been limited this week, but my husband has made a few brief phone calls, and we each know the other is doing fine, we say our I love you's, and that's that. But through Facebook and direct conversations, some wives have made it clear that they are already struggling--emotionally, financially, or for some other reason. I was shocked by the situations some wives are in. I want to be compassionate and helpful, but I also think there is a list of reasonable things a wife should have when her husband leaves for any length of time:
1. She should have a phone and a way to consistently pay the bill
2. She should have a drivers' license
3. She should have access to a vehicle to get herself to the grocery store and doctor's appointments.
4. She should be able to pay the household bills and track the family budget
5. She should have at least one person, (friend or family member), who is in the local area and can be reached in case of emergency.

It amazes me that there are wives who somehow get by without some of these things, especially when they are responsible for 1 or more small children! But it amazes me more when husbands leave their wives without working out solutions to some of the above problems. Because then it suddenly falls into the lap of the FRO or the nearest spouse in the battalion when these women aren't able to function without their husband around. Does this list sound reasonable to you? Or are these luxuries that I have come to take for granted?

Wordless Wednesday

Summer is officially here!

Welcome to the 3rd trimester!

I am finally 28 weeks into this pregnancy! That means the beginning of the 3rd trimester. I'm pretty excited about that, because summer has already seemed long and hot, and I keep forgetting that it is only May! In some ways I want to hurry up and be done and meet this darling little boy... but I'm not in THAT much of a rush! :-) I am just now realizing what a nice, manageable age my other children are: Sophie is 3, and Danny is 1 and 1/2. That means they can both walk when we go somewhere, and I don't need to carry a diaper bag around (just keep a few diapers in the car for longer outings). They can play together (with supervision and occasional time-outs) and entertain themselves for 15 or more minutes at a time, while I do chores or even read a book nearby. They can express themselves, feed themselves, and the oldest can even dress and bathe herself-- with some assistance. Both kids sleep all night long, and during afternoon naptime too. Now that I am no longer a full-time student, this Mommy gig is actually pretty easy... some days! I'm not saying they don't try my patience on a daily basis, and make more messes than I would like, but life right now is nothing compared to the craziness we will face with a newborn. When I think about those months of sleep-deprivation, when the baby continually cries, nurses, and then cries some more--well, I feel a bit exhausted just imagining it! We have just 3 more months before our lives change completely, so I want to make the most of this time, and try to relax and enjoy my time with just TWO kids as much as possible!

Treasuring Mommy-hood

I had a terrible dream last night. Surprisingly, not about my husband, since it was his first night away in a while. Instead I dreamed that both our children died. No terrible incident or gory event. We were just driving along, they were in their car seats, and they never woke up. Next thing I know I'm at their funeral, burying both my kids, and crying uncontrollably. It was horrible! Of course when I woke up I was relieved that it was just a dream, but the first thing I did was rush to their rooms and make sure they were ok. It was already morning, so they were awake, and those good-morning hugs and kisses were so sweet!
I resolved to treasure this day, and not to have a bad attitude about being a temporary single-mom. And you know what? We had an AMAZING day! The kids were great at church, then we enjoyed donuts afterwards. There is a carnival on base, so we went to that for a while and they had a great time on the Carousel and other rides. Then they took long naps, I relaxed, made dinner, and we had a quiet evening watching home videos and playing together. Sweet and beautiful.
Mommy-hood might be a tough job, but I woke up today realizing what a truly WONDERFUL job it is. It is a gift that can be taken away at any moment. People are always saying that kids grow up too fast. I confess that for the past few months I have been hoping mine would grow up just a little faster. With the new baby coming, I am eager for the oldest to learn to dress herself, and for the youngest to learn to feed himself, so that I do not have 3 helpless children to take care of! But no matter how helpless and frustrating they are, I am lucky to be their mom, and would never give them up. I am hoping to hold onto this positive attitude at least for the next month that we are on our own. I resolve to not sweat the small stuff, and to truly treasure my time with my great little kids. :-)

Treasuring a beautiful day with the kids.